Evil Shower Monsters in Boggs Hall!

             The residence hall that I live in, here at UGA, is called Boggs Hall.  Yes, even the name of it is gross sounding to where monsters should probably live here.  Lately, I have come to the realization that there are most likely evil monsters in the showers.  I only say this, because it is a true fact, and since I have found out about these monsters I feel as though I should share the secret with the rest of the world.  Yesterday, after my blazing hot shower, which scolded my back and also made the droplets of water on my skin into ice sickles, it finally dawned on me that the only reason a shower could ever be that terrible was if evil monsters were stowed away behind the shower heads and temperature knobs until someone came in to take a shower.  I believe that the monsters' main goal is to inflict pain on any resident living in Boggs for the sake of their own entertainment.  

               After returning to my room after the worst shower ever, I thought about if this whole monster thing could actually be true.  Once I thought about it for a while, all of the dots connected in my brain and those dots spelled out "EVIL SHOWER MONSTERS!", in side of my head.  So now that those dots are connected I have a clear image in my head of what these monsters look like, how the act, and how I will someday either kill them or hopefully escape from any harm they may bring upon me.

               Ok so here it goes.  These monsters are most likely an awful shade of green such as mildew or throw up, or they are a disgusting brownish color, you know the one.  They might be a little hairy, but since they live in the showers, their hair is coated with rotting shampoo and conditioner, shaving cream, and moldy shower water.  It all makes sense now why the bathrooms in Boggs have a very distinctive smell.  As for their personality and characteristics, they are of course evil, they prey on those who just want to have decent hygiene, but I guess since the monsters smell so awful, they want everyone else in Boggs to sink down to their level and be miserable.  What these monsters do is sense the residents in Boggs who want to take showers, wait at their posts behind the shower heads and knobs and the once any resident gets the temperature just right...BAM scolding hot water!  If that doesn't happen, then it's only a matter of time before the monsters wait until you're about to rinse shampoo out of your hair and then switch the water to a freezing cold rain until goose bumps rise so high on the skin that it feels as though your skin will burst at any moment.  

               So now that I have realized that these monsters really do exist, I have come up with a plan to get rid of them.  What I am going to do, is once I get into the shower and spend the ten minutes trying to get the temperature just right, I will turn the knobs all different ways hopefully trapping the monsters' hair to where it twists in the knobs, and causing them to have so much pain that they won't want to change the temperature anymore.  As for the monsters living behind the shower heads, I will clog it with shampoo, shaving cream, and conditioner so that maybe it will reach up to them monsters, make them smell good, and then they will realize that good hygiene isn't such a bad thing after all.  The best part of this situation though, is that I am moving into a townhome next school year and there won't be any evil monsters left over after I try out my plan...hopefully.